Journal of Sacred Work & Radical Loving Care

Life's Load-Bearing Pillar - Days 30-34

 The instant we exit the womb we pursue stability. Our first test, The Apgar, checks whether we throw our arms out when a caregiver mimics dropping us. 

   Indeed, the falling test and the startle reflex are bizarre proofs that we are born with only two fears: falling (something Hitchcock used routinely) and sudden sounds.

   Babies flail for physical stability. We pursue emotional stability. The first comes naturally. The second is often elusive.

   Each search signals that life depends on finding our load-bearing pillar. Most say we need many. My central one: meaning. Without meaning there is no hope and without hope, we die. Children seek solid ground for first steps and meaning from parents.

   Oak trees symbolize my load-bearing pillar. I love their strength, deep roots, soaring branches, their ability to look human.  

   My oak starts with God who is love and light. I trust what I cannot see as solid ground.

   Why are their constant threats to our balance? Money, illness, job loss, betrayal, imprisonment, violence, ugliness. Ugliness drives me to its opposite: Beauty. Imagining myself a strong male I seek balance in my opposite: Woman. 

   When my career journey veered from the masculine combat of trial attorney (my generation) to the hospital world of caregiving, I found that the load-bearing energy was feminine. 

   Fortunately, my first caregiver was a woman. God willing, my last caregiver will be as well.

-Erie Chapman

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Photopainting: "Pillars - Back View" - Erie 2023 

 

The Heart of Creation Days 28-29

 

Leading with Love

A pure gift is not given according to the logic of the Roman motto

do ut des – “I give that you might give to me” – but rather in another sense: “I give because I have received.”

 Exact repayment is transformed into an attitude of free and unselfish giving-on to others. The clearest example of this is love. Love cannot be balanced out through justice; love exists only when it is not owed, when it is freely offered. This pure gift is the heart of creation...

Shared by Liz Soresen Wessel
Photo By ~liz

Our Geography - Days 25-27

   Thank you for opening to an image perhaps uncomfortable. I hope that will ease as you read. 

   Great poets change us. The incomparable David Whyte writes, "The human body constitutes a live geography, as does the spirit and the identity that abides within it."

   Dressed or not, we recognize others first by their landscape. The architecture of the face. The differences between male and female. The woman's back slopping to hips widened for childbirth.

   Because I see women as Beauty's source and a shape opposite mine, I have always been drawn to her as artist as well as man. Her figure speaks Love's best creation. 

    Through art museums, academic study and a communion with dancers, I have photographed, filmed and sculpted the female form since 1975*. My work has received countless awards & been hung in galleries, museums and universities internationally. 

   Yet, it seems so inconsistent with my conventional career that many are aghast. We are less sophisticated than ancient Greeks. Portraying nudes remains dangerous.

   Sadly, women without clothes have frequently been objectified. Sadly, most people are not educated to differentiate art from pornography.

   

   Uncovering in a medical context, appropriately done when medicalized, remains difficult for women. Indeed, we must protect the sacred. 

   All of this confuses art appreciation. As Minton Sparks says, in our films Dreams of Drowning & After Drowning, "There's an implicit message that to gain power [women] have to swim in the vulnerability of their own nakedness"

   Museum goers often turn their away from Beauty's best slopes, curves and shadows towards her offspring: mountains, flowers, oceans. 

   The larger point: When we hide from respectful presentations of the female form we blind ourselves to the sacred. The problem is not the geography of nudes but Society's failure to teach appreciation of the body as Soul's home. 

   Can an we absorb Whyte's wisdom? "To live out our genius is to live out the conversation between our particular inherited body and the body of the world."

   Staying stuck is staying ignorant. "Throw the emptiness out of your arms/ to add to the spaces we breathe; maybe the birds/ will feel the expansion of air, in more intimate flight," Rilke writes. 

   Can we open our arms to broader life experiences? Can you, a weary caregiver accustomed to healing broken bodies, find greater beauty in the brilliant geography of your own and all others?

-Erie Chapman

*

https://nashvillearts.com/2018/07/the-other-side-of-erie-chapman/

"Minton's Back" Erie, 2018

Love is the Bridge Days 21-24

This week I connected with a friend who is going through a difficult time. She acknowledged the sadness that she is feeling and the myriad of emotions that arise when one experiences loss and the uncertainty that accompanies an ending. Yet, she is choosing optimism over despair as she begins to envision opportunities that may come with the unfolding of this change. It is in this primordial time, when we can create space to step back and re-evaluate where we are in our lives, to listen deeply, breathe deeply… and let go of the pilings that may keep us from the exploration of new possibilities. To pause and let germinate what is about to be birthed, to listen in quiet, ever so gently, with kindness and self-nurturance.

She acknowledged that at times little thoughts of self-doubt arise momentarily but soon dissipate as affirming thoughts return. I love that my friend is so grounded. We talked about “going within to find our strength before we go out” and the importance of tapping into our internal guiding force. It is so important to honor and reverence what has been before we move on. To do less, diminishes the impact of our life experiences, the relationships we have forged and all that we have cherished along the way.  Change requires that we leave our comfort zone and stretch beyond ourselves.

I shared, “I recall times in my life, when it felt as though I was in a dark tunnel, as facing the unknown stirs up ambiguity. Yet, time and again, something positive has unfolded in embracing something new on my life journey. Looking back, we might say, who would have thought? Or, I never could have imagined things would have turned out like this…I feel so blessed. At that point, my friend recounted this wonderful story, “Several years ago I was on my way home and it was dark and raining. Fortunately my two kids were not in the car with me because I was in a car accident. This woman, a perfect stranger came out of nowhere and began to offer assistance and comfort, asking if I was okay, calling for help and staying with me until the ambulance came to take me to the hospital. Before being whisked away I asked her what her name was and how I might contact her to thank her properly later on. Guess what! I reached out and we became the best of friends. Our kids have grown up together and we still get together all the time. Such a blessing came out of such a difficult experience. I would never had met her if that accident had not happened.”

I am so grateful that my friend shared this beautiful story that lingers so sweetly.  It illustrates something I have come to appreciate. In every situation, no matter how difficult, there are good people who show up for us. They are the light bearers and Light finds a away in amid the darkest of times bringing hope, a gift of love and a reminder of the sacredness of our encounters.

Liz Sorensen Wessel
Photo by Liz

Days 16-20 Recognition or Relevance?

   “Everyone has the power for greatness, not for fame but greatness, because greatness is determined by service.” This quote by Martin Luther King, Jr. is true in general. Is it true for you and me?

   Some of the best stories my dad told me as a kid were about when he was a kid. "I was so desperate for an award that I took a bronze vase from my mother's shelf and created a race I was sure I'd win," he shared sheepishly, "and when I did, the cup was my trophy"  

   Dad was a champion at praising his children. He did the same with employees at the Y.M.C.A.'s he led.

   When I became a leader in 5th grade (and forever after) giving sincere recognition became my metier. There are dangers. First, fake praise. Eventually, the recipient senses the counterfeit. Both sides feel empty. The second danger (a mistake I still make), is to think recognition determines worth. 

   A hollow feeling always hid below my career pursuits: Was I seeking the "trophy" for glory or doing something was meaningful? 

   Serving others, whether in healthcare, law, ministry or through my art, has been a life credo. I have gotten extensive recognition, deserved or not. We all want our motives to be sincere.

   Clearly, the choice between recognition and relevance is not binary. Dr. King loved winning the Nobel Prize. Simultaneously, his joy was informed by knowing his work mattered. A great thing about winning the worlds top trophy is that it combines both goals. 

   Relevance is meaning. Recognition is fame. Dr. King won both. But, caregivers win the only trophy that matters whenever they serve others. 

-Erie Chapman

Picture of Dr King from class photo  

Unfinished or Endless? Days 14-15

The Unfinished

By Viktor E. Frankl

We cannot judge a biography by its length,
Nor by the number of pages in it.
We must judge it by the richness of its contents
Sometimes those unfinished are among the most poignant.
We cannot judge a song by its duration
Nor by the number of its notes
We must judge it by the way it touches and lifts our souls
Sometimes those unfinished are among the most beautiful.
And when something has enriched your life
And when its melody lingers on in your heart
Is it unfinished?
Or is it endless?

Dedicated in loving memory of Jessica Kate Jablonski, whose life has been a beautiful symphony, spreading light, love and joy to all who encountered her.

 

For Reflection: Unfinished or endless, what are your thoughts?

 

Watercolor by Liz Sorensen Wessel

"One Thing At A Time"? Days 9-13

   By the time I got down the hallway to the kitchen I had forgotten what I ran to fetch. It is not the first time. That is why I run. To maximize the chance I will remember. In this case, I am at risk for becoming distracted by the 20 photographs that adorn the walls.  

   I asked a friend how she spent her time." I misplace things," she laughed.   

   The primary reason for my forgetfulness is not age. It is the exponential growth in the volume of information older people have. Plus, I am endlessly distracted by ideas.

   Ideaphorics* are always absent-minded. Floods of ideas make everyday stuff unworthy of remembering. 

   A Buddhist monk once described the essence of Zen as "One thing at a time." Great wisdom that I consistently ignore.

   Society demands that leaders & caregivers multitask and make no mistakes! The same is true of leaders, artists & anyone else attempting to accomplish many things. One thing at a time? Impossible. 

   One practice helps: Meditation. Every time I engage this 20-minute practice it works!

   Today, I planned my twenty minutes & ran the hall to tell my wife. By then I had forgotten. 

-Erie Chapman

* Ideaphoria: "Capacity for creative thought or imagination." (Merriam-Webster)

Please support Radical Loving Care by donating a dollar to Erie Chapman Foundation via: www.eriechapmanfoundation.net. THANK YOU. 

Photo: "The Hall" Erie Chapman, '23

To Welcome the Stranger Home Days 6-7

The Year as a House: A Blessing

Think of the year as a house: door flung wide in welcome,
threshold swept and waiting, a graced spaciousness
opening and offering itself to you.

Let it be blessed in every room.
Let it be hallowed in every corner.
Let every nook be a refuge
and every object set to holy use.

Let it be here that safety will rest.
Let it be here that health will make its home.
Let it be here that peace will show its face.
Let it be here that love will find its way.

Here let the weary come
let the aching come
let the lost come
let the sorrowing come.

Here let them find their rest
and let them find their soothing
and let them find their place
and let them find their delight.

And may it be in this house of a year
that the seasons will spin in beauty,
and may it be in these turning days
that time will spiral with joy.
And may it be that its rooms will fill
with ordinary grace
and light spill from every window
to welcome the stranger home.

By Jan Richardson

 

May you be blessed! 

Offered by Liz Sorensen Wessel

Artist unknown

Careers That ADD Years - Days 1-5

  Sure. Doctors have an above average life span. Nurses? Not so much.

   But if you could crank back the clock & pick a profession that would enhance your longevity and joy (the two are linked) two careers stand out.

   The first is no surprise. Everyone knows the answer. It is nuns. Not just Catholic but Buddhist.

   The surprise comes with the other finding on longevity...a job held by folks that flap their arms around on stage & are rewarded with cascades of joyful sound. Music conductors have long topped the list of the long-lived. 

   Note Leopold Stokowski, 95, & Arturo Toscanini, 89. Important illustrations because average life expectancy in their era was 50. 

   Not surprisingly, another group of musicians is at the bottom of the longevity chart: rock musicians. Another low score went to another group of artists we call poets.

   Is the meaning of life more important than its length? It is to me. 

   Nuns & conductors win the quality/quantity quandary by achieving both.   

   Teachers have notoriously long life spans. However, it is hard to surpass caregiving when it comes to meaning of family when it comes to what matters. The selfie made by my son defines Hope for me in ten faces. It shows every member of my immediate family starting with my wife (3rd from left), son, left, & daughter, 4th from left. 

   Here is a life challenging New Year's resolution: If your work holds deep meaning stick with it...even through periods of burnout. If your work is just a job, switch to something that matters to you.

   Above all, draw neigh to family & friends. Help those you do not know. That is my recipe for a Happy New Year. 

   In the end, what matters most cannot be measured. 

Erie Chapman