Long ago I shared with an acquaintance the agonies of my Crohn's disease. "I know exactly how you feel," he said, "my brother has that."
He had no idea "exactly" how I felt. He simply knew about being a brother to a sufferer. But, compassion can be learned.
The road to compassion runs through the city of pain. Pain burns unique brands into each of us. We experience agony differently so none of us ever knows another's experience.
Have you ever experienced the superiority of feeling healthy while another is ill? "I'm well & strong & he's sick & flawed," my acquaintance may have thought.
"Pain is the first proper step to real compassion," David Whyte writes. "It can be a foundation for understanding all those who struggle with their existence."
Compassion can birth deep listening, It can turn your heart to what lies beneath the suffering of another & deter jumping to judgment.
In a Facebook post, Chris York (left), recent recipient of the CEO of the Year award from Erie Chapman Foundation, showed one reason why he is America's finest healthcare leader.
"My apologies to [former 49ers quarterback] Colin Kaepernick," Chris wrote, "I was critical of his approach [4 years ago] to protesting police brutality and I was wrong...Today, I can’t help but wonder how much better off we’d be as a country had we listened to his message."
How much better would hospital care be if we listened?
Staying open-minded. Humility in recognizing a mistake. The courage to publicly apologize. All characteristics of great leaders (& never demonstrated by our President.)
Compassion lives at the core as Radical Loving Caregiving: To honor another's pain by remembering your own. To bravely live love to help another. These mark the pathway to healing.
Yes. It is easier to advise then to follow my own counsel. Perhaps that is why I often write this Journal to myself as well as to you.
Thank you giving love whether or not it is reciprocated.
-Erie Chapman
