E Last summer, my then 18-month-old grandson looked into the mirror. His father asked, "Who is that?" "Reed," he answered as if he had discovered gold. And my son said to his son, "That's right!"
Reed had entered a "reality" that governs our lives: That the person in the mirror is us.
We know there is not just one of us. The self portrait from 1977 has been updated with images of different "me's" at different ages being watched over by a guardian angel. All of those people are within me now accompanied by a crowd of others.
The importance of our multiple personas is a fact routinely & tragically overlooked by many caregivers. The doctor or nurse that sees the wrinkled skin of an elderly patient & brands them as old & less relevant misses the complex humanity of the many people that person has been...and is. Loving caregivers give better care because they understand the many lives inside the one before them
So many personas lurk within: The brilliant you, the angry you. The you who grieves, laughs, lies, plays childlike with a child, treats your dog as a person, speaks rudely to a clerk.
And there is the you who wants to escape the present. To run from the fear of being trapped by constantly scanning for the nearest exit.
This helps when threats are as real as an attacking Grizzly. But for many running away is a strategy to escape not just headaches or an angry boss but fear of abandonment, loss of hope or simple ennui.
Fear is the enemy of presence. Fear blocks adventure & discovery, can destroy relationships & defeat meaningful experiences.
Fear does not just make us run from tigers. If you routinely choose flight it can deaden your life.
Strangely, one of the most effective ways to deal with most threats is to stand still. Embrace your fear & thus weaken its power over you.
The most soul-enriching path is the hardest to choose: To sit with Fear. Watch it. Befriend it as a teacher that will illuminate truth. To listen to it as a guide to the Love we were meant to live.
-Erie Chapman
