Journal of Sacred Work

Days 275-279 - Impressions

   The early impressionist painters taught us to see differently - that the world is not clearly defined as the realists painters portrayed it. 

   Unintentionally, they taught us much more. Everything we experience is filtered by the lens of our unique world view. 

   An ophthalmologist may see your eyes as in need of examination. A poet might like to write about them. An artist sees them as a painting. 

   A step beyond impressionism is abstract art. An artist may name a blob of paint on a canvas, "Tree." Such abstract art frustrates many.

   Different kinds of painting call viewers to work harder to appreciate art. 

   Different kinds of patients call caregivers to the same kind of commitment.

   An articulate & appreciative patient is a caregiver's delight - a realist painting easy to understand. An Alzheimer's patient may seem like only an impression of a former self. A patient distorted by the horrors of a fire may seem like an abstraction of a human.

   Healing is a grand abstract painting. It is as hard to define as love & just as worthy of the commitment it takes to achieve it. 

-Erie Chapman

Photograph by Erie 

Days 273-274 Turning People Into Trees

When you go out into the woods and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some of them are bent, and some of them are straight, and some of them are evergreens, and some of them are whatever.

And you look at the tree and you allow it.

                    You appreciate it.

                You see why it is the way it is.

You sort of understand that it didn’t get enough light, and so it turned that way. And you don’t get all emotional about it. You just allow it. You appreciate the tree.

The minute you get near humans, you lose all that.   And you are constantly saying “You’re too this, or I’m too this.” That judging mind comes in.

     And so I practice turning people into trees.

        Which means appreciating them just the way they are.

                                                                                Reflection by Ram Dass

 

Drawing by Liz Sorensen Wessel

 

Days 268-272 - "Room at the Top of the World"

   "You are missing so much by not traveling!" a friend chastised me, using a stridency that rings in my ears a year later. Her misunderstanding of my travel-aversion infused her warning with guilt & disdain. 

   Shamed, I wondered what she saw that I was missing? She produced a fine array of photographs she had made of rock formations in the Baja. Amid compliments I asked her husband what he thought of his wife's artwork. "It's just a bunch of rocks," he said.

   What if we do not have the freedom to traverse the world as do my friends? What if we are bound to a caregiving role that calls us to reach into diseased bodies at work & nurture children at home?  

   Fortunately, beauty dwells nearby now. The intricate pansies float in a tiny pool in my back yard. What lies near you?

   The scarfed angel cloud-dances with the moon. She knows that we are all sometimes desperate to escape but cannot abandon our work. Instead, we imagine.

   Tom Petty gave us a pretty option in the opening lines to a searing song: "I got a room at the top of the world tonight/ I can see everything tonight...I got a room at the top of the world tonight/ and I ain't comin' down."

   Our "room at the top of the world" is not thousands of miles away but within - or not at all. I have found mine & I ain't comin' down. 

-Erie Chapman

   Photoart - erie

Days 266-267 In the Thick of Things

Spiritual awakening is frequently described as a journey to the top of a mountain. We leave our attachments and our worldliness behind and slowly make our way to the top. At the peak we have transcended all pain.

 The only problem with this metaphor is that we leave all the others behind-our drunken brother, our schizophrenic sister, our tormented animals and friends. Their suffering continues, unrelieved by our personal escape.

In the process of discovering bodhichitta, (the awakened heart) the journey goes down, not up. It’s as if the mountain pointed toward the center of the earth instead of reaching into the sky. Instead of transcending the suffering of all creatures, we move toward the turbulence and doubt. We jump into it. We slide into it. We tiptoe into it. We move toward it however we can.

We explore the reality and unpredictability of insecurity and pain, and we try not to push it away. If it takes years, if it takes lifetimes, we let it be as it is. At our own pace, without speed or aggression, we move down and down and down.

With us move millions of others, our companions in awakening from fear. At the bottom we discover water, the healing water of bodhichitta.

Right down there in the thick of things, we discover the love that will not die. ~Pema Chodron

Reflection by Pema Chodron

Mandala by ~liz

Days 261-265 "Three Identical Strangers"

   I hate it when someone tells me "You HAVE to see this movie." You do not have to see "Three Identical Strangers." But if do you will always remember it because you will be forever changed - for the better.

   It gives nothing away to say that this is a documentary about triplets. What is stunning is how this film delivers one shocking surprise after another.

   That is partly because we think we know what is going to happen - that this will be the same old "separated-at-birth" story in which we see that triplets are the same even though they did not grow up together, right? Yes. But, more importantly, NO!

   This movie matters because of what it tells us about differences, not similarities. For what it tells us about the astonishing ways each of us is unique & the differences we can make in each other's lives.

   There is a caregiving theme woven through this riveting story: an affirmation of how loving care transcend genetics - no matter how strong they are. 

-Erie Chapman

Days 259-260 Within the Light

It’s as if you are having a bad dream that you just can’t wake up from and I’ve entered into your dream to accompany you on this journey.  We both laughed amid the confusion that accompanies memory loss, and my heart smiles as you, my friend can find humor in any situation. This would be funny of it was not so poignantly distressing.

There are the moments of fear and anxiety too but how easily you find calm through simple explanations and are quick to express gratitude, “Oh thank you for ‘authenticating’ this, now I understand and I can rest in peace.”  We make great progress in the moment but within minutes our dialogue loops around and around again. It's as though we are in the movie “Ground Hogs Day.”

 I have a lot to learn about Alzheimer’s disease. And you know, don’t you? You told me you googled it and you tell me, “Liz, my brain is not working anymore. I don’t want to be a burden and I feel so bad about myself and each time I respond. “Knock it off” and we both laugh, every time.

I know, that more than anything, you want to be at home and I want to make that happen for you.  (I can’t let on but the responsibility is onerous and weighs heavy, especially since you are alone without family. We are your family.

As I delve beneath the surface of the dramas that are continually unfolding, I can’t tell you, but I find myself touching upon a deep sadness. I wish you were not in this perilous dream as the life you love slips away bit by bit. You often tell me that you have no regrets and that you have lived a great life having travelled the world and serving your community as a mid-wife in England and then as a home care nurse for 25 years. As your trusted friend and the DPA I want to turn this dream into a happy one.

This whole situation is a very humbling experience, one that takes me to my knees, while a window opens into empathy, compassion and awakens glimmers of hope, especially through the caring gestures of others.

….And through the grace of God everything is brighter within the light of a new day, my friend, or as you often say, "In God we trust."

Prayer by Vienna Cobb Anderson

Reflection by Liz Sorensen Wessel

Watercolor by ~liz

Days 253-257 - 5 Milligrams

  Need relief? Gaze at this image of water & woods.

   Or you can swallow 5 milligrams of Valium or one of the opioids commonly prescribed by doctors.

   We have such confidence in medications that we have all but given up on the idea that anything but drugs can bring us comfort.

  Yet, the right words, the right music or the right scenery can have just as much effect on us physically as may a drug. We know that but are unlikely to choose music over medication.

   It is remarkably hard to convince leaders that their demeanor impacts team energy. It also does not make sense to them that the way a nurse walks into a room or the tone of a leader in a crisis affects brain chemistry. 

   If you agree that it does, think about the effect your presence & your words have on those around you. Look again at this waterfall. Marvel at Beauty's effect. 

-Erie Chapman

Photograph by Erie 

Days 251-252 Devotion

Note: This marvelous Reflection is offered by Terry Chapman

 Photo of Shackleton leaving Elephant Island to seek help

 Care giving of all kinds can be seen as a loving act, whether it takes place in a hospital, a home, or even far out at sea! Captain Ernest Shackleton was a devoted leader of his men when stranded in ice off Antarctica in 1916.  Stopping over on Elephant Island, he then continued his Odyssey with 6 of his crew; rowed and sailed 800 miles to South Georgia island. They all climbed over a mountain and found help at a whaling station; then returned to his stranded men on Elephant Island and sailed them all safely home.  Shackleton was loyal and steadfast in his determination to serve his crew. He never wavered or complained; he just persisted in saving their lives!  

We can all learn an invaluable lesson from this story: devote yourself to others in ways only you will know how to do.  Each of us has been given special talents—gifts from God—which we can use daily in improving the life of our fellow companions on planet Earth.  Sail forward and point your oar toward each journey’s goal: safe passage and smoother sailing for all!

Special thanks to Terry Chapman for sharing this inspiring story of courage and unwavering devotion.

Days 246-250 - The Angel of Legacy

   When the angel comes to lift you from this earth what legacy will she whisper to those that remain? The answer turns not only on what we have done but in how others interpret our lives & what stories they choose to tell. 

   The world's reality is that the whole of us can only be remembered in pieces: a handful of squares cut from the quilt of our lives. We are often remembered in sound bites: "She was a good nurse," or, "He was a fine executive," or "She touched many lives."

   Your family & your heart friends will remember more. Even they are constricted by their capacity to appreciate the deepest levels of your life &  spirit.

   The most sensitive & eloquent will be the storytellers & the artists. These are the marvelous beings who have trained themselves to create pictures with words & words that create pictures.

   The recent passing of two giants gave us opportunities to witness exquisite goodbyes that presage fine legacies. 

   Legacies are gifts. Aretha Franklin, The Queen of Soul, left us presents that reach through our hearts to plant roses in our spirit.

   Senator John McCain leaves a legacy of stunning integrity.  McCain was what his main detractor, our current President, is not - a hero. Trump's exclusion from the funeral reinforced a contrast: McCain, whose courage illuminated the world. Trump, whose energy darkens life. 

   The greatest eloquence for both came not from words or pictures but from music - Franklin's transcendent songs, McCain's resplendent choices of classical, military & religious hymns of elegance. 

   We cannot be so famous as to be known by our first name, Aretha, or our last name McCain. But, starting now, we can commit great acts: to relieve suffering & advance kindness.

  And the best news is that fame has nothing to do with legacy. Kindnesses bloom whether or not we know the identity of the planter. 

   Kindness begins with Liz Wessel's quote in her weekend essay about how we see others, "The person across from you is a community of persons—persons met during a lifetime.  Each carries with them a mother and a father, student and teacher, brother and sister, enemy and friend."

-Erie Chapman

Surrealist Image: "Visitation by The Angel of Legacy - by Erie   

Days 244-245 Something Precious

"I would see you as my friend, / That I may remember you are a part of me / And come to know myself." -Course in Miracles

Prayer of the Person

The person across from you is the greatest miracle and the greatest mystery in this moment—a testament of God’s continuing creation and presence in the world.

The person across from you is an inexhaustible reservoir of possibility, with potentialities only partially realized.

The person across from you is a unique universe of experience—of possibility and necessity, laughter and tears, love and indifference, hopes and fears—all struggling for expression.

The person across from you believes in something—something precious; stands for something, lives for something, labors for something, waits for something, runs for something, runs towards something.

The person across from you is not perfect—often feels disappointed, is often undecided and disorganized and woefully close to chaos; but is endowed with a tremendous inner strength, and is capable of surviving great difficulties and persecutions.

The person across from you is a community of persons—persons met during a lifetime.  Each carries with them a mother and a father, student and teacher, brother and sister, enemy and friend.

The person across from you does some things like no one else in the world.  There is something this one life on earth means and cares for –will that person dare speak it of you?

The person across from you is more description than explanation. The person across from you is MYSTERY made in God’s image, never to be fully understood.

Look before you, and within you---look around---for God is indeed among us!

~Anonymous (most likely written by a Sister of St. Joseph)

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel

Watercolor by ~liz