Journal of Sacred Work

Days 288-292 - A Picture of God?

     Do you feel guilty when you miss church? It is a guilt trip for me. I  often think of church as an obligation not a celebration. And Jesus cannot find his way into a heart locked in duty rather than opened by love.  

   A friend recommended a sage named Mooji. He asks, "How can you meet the lord of the heart without imagination?" You cannot "see" Love (in church or elsewhere) anymore than you can see God in the white photograph.

   Or can you? If people can imagine Jesus in a cloud maybe they can imagine him on a blank page. 

   What is it that, bypassing the mind, "requires no effort to be?" What kind of imagination does it take to encounter this "lord of the heart," this Jesus whose radical loving presence changed the world?

   On our brief life journey there are few questions more important & few that are harder to stick with. Jesus was & is Love's embodiment. Our mind cannot easily capture such answers so most of us default to other's ideas never finding our own.  

   What about the white space between these letters? I never notice because "nothing" is there. Blank white is dismissed in favor of what "fills the page." Is the white space nothing or everything? 

   "As long as we conceive of ourselves as a person then there will be things to be done and undone," Mooji says, "something to reach for, something to leave, something to fix, something to change, something to become." What about the white space where there is nothing to be done? Must we always fill it? Who are we outside our personhood?

   It is so hard to escape flooding our lives with frenetic activity. The invitation to listen for the spaces between notes seems impossible if not ridiculous.

   Life turns on relationships with others & with our environment. In drawing close, lovers of all kinds also experience isolation born from the skin's spiritual boundaries. "All of us suffer from our own mind, our own projections, our own identities," Mooji suggests. "it is this that gives us the sense of separation..." 

   What happens when we consider Jesus' invitation to pray for our enemies & to give unselfishly to others? Fear extends its tentacles:What if I give too many of my things away? Will I have enough left to live as I want? What if I commit my heart to another? Will it (like flesh) be wounded beyond healing? 

   We load up on things, guard our hearts & thus experience a deeper poverty. Jesus says give love & you will be replenished. Mostly we do not believe that. Jesus says, pray for your enemies. I know few "Christians" who do that. Yet, loving caregivers feel God's presence. 

   My favorite line in Mooji's talk is one of his last. "What keeps you you and me me? Who made this law? Who said it is true?"

   Are we really so separate?

-Reverend Erie Chapman    

Days 286-287 Sixth Annual International Caregiver's Day

“There is a light in this world, a healing spirit more powerful than any darkness we may encounter. We sometimes lose sight of this force when there is suffering and too much pain. Then suddenly, the spirit will emerge through the lives of ordinary people who hear a call and answer in extraordinary ways.” ~Mother Teresa

 August 26^th is the day Mother Teresa was born and what better way to honor her memory this week, than to celebrate the contributions of loving caregivers from around the world.

 Take a moment think about all the people you encounter each day, your family, friends, and colleagues or kindnesses of people you may not even know.

 Gestures of caring in small and big ways; but when offered with love, each are meaningful and equally precious.

 Share a word, thought, an affirmation, a prayer of gratitude whether spoken aloud or in the silence of your heart.

 

Liz Sorensen Wessel

Poster/photo-by~liz

Days 281-285 - The Secret of Old Age

   People approach her now as royalty. Their faces flush with joy amid the grace she exudes. With her latest birthday, she has accomplished something they covet. She is 103 & healthy.

   Oddly, most can barely congratulate her without rushing to brag about their own long-lived relatives. "My mom just turned 91," one fellow crowed today as he & and a pal stood by my mom. "I got you beat," his friend trumpeted. "My mom is 95!"

   Then both fell silent realizing they sounded foolish before one who is older than anyone they know (although you may already be anxious to say you have a grandma who is 110.)

   Why are we bragging anyway? What did we do?

   If this is a game of "Can You Top This," I guess my mom wins, at least in most crowds. She could not care less. 

   She often forgets her age anyway. She knows that it is quality of life not quantity that counts. She knows some live more in thirty years than others do in seventy. 

   Joy makes up in height for what it lacks in length. Amazingly, she has the gift of both. 

   The day after her birthday I asked Mom about God. "I'm not ready to meet him yet," she laughed. She loves her life.

   Everyone seeks Mom's secret. "I brush my teeth after dinner so I won't eat anymore,." she told one person. She takes one pill (a semi-useful thyroid concoction,) walked three miles a day up until she was 94 & has never taken a vitamin or read a single book on how to live a long & successful life. She laughs a lot & (unlike me) never preaches to anyone. 

   Inner peace is ageless. Joy is measureless. Both have richness. We find that wealth by living love, not fear. And by laughing a lot.  

Erie Chapman    

Days 279-280 Summer Days

“Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything that is beautiful; for beauty is God's handwriting ~ a wayside sacrament. Welcome it in every fair face, in every fair sky, in every fair flower, and thank God for it as a cup of blessing.”  -Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Summer days are made for cloud gazing. Looking heavenward opens a majestic view.

                                                

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vast land formations that were once whole are now separated by only a fathomless blue sea.  Hints of how ancient our world really is.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A geography lesson begs to be explored. Forms take shape to reveal each continents history. Interlocking puzzle pieces that wish to share their story; your story.

You need not go far to become a world traveler. 

                                                                                                                                                                                              

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Liz Sorensen Wessel
 Summer Photos:  2015 ~liz

Days 274-278 - The Power of Fun

    Joseph Cartwright is the CEO of a 500 bed hospital. He is intelligent & dedicated. He also projects, unintentionally, a stiff demeanor.

   Although Joseph is caring it does not show. An employee party with a Hawaiian theme  was designed to bring fun to the workplace. One executive suggested that Mr. Cartwright put on a Hawaiian shirt to display his lighter side.

   Mr. Cartwright agreed. The staff was thrilled until the boss appeared wearing the Hawaiian shirt over his business suit, his tie clearly visible.   

   A key premise in my new book, The Seven Powers of Radical Loving Leaders (now on Amazon) is that we should take our work seriously, not ourselves. Caregivers must project a professional demeanor. But, it is exhausting to be serious all the time - and it leads to burnout.

   To advance this point I made a two-minute video. Click above or click on this link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDgZlVFvNmU

-Erie Chapman

Days 272-273 What Do You Love?

Erie Chapman’s provocative Journal essay  has stimulated much thought and discussion among Journal readers (Days 267-271 - The Courage to Live and to Die?. Most people would agree it is important to talk with their physician about their wishes for medical care should they lose the ability to speak for themselves (80%; Source:  Coalition For Compassionate Care). However, very few people actually have the conversation (of those polled only 7%). People may experience the irrational thought or superstition that if we talk about end of life care we may hasten its arrival. Or some may deny the reality in hopes that, as in a bad dream, it will go away. Additionally, a quality conversation and exploration of these concerns takes time. Many physicians are already overstretched and lack the time for these in-depth discussions.

When a loved one is seriously ill family members may avoid talking because they fear it may make the person feel sad, anxious or depressed. Everyone is trying to protect each other from truth telling. If someone you love winds up hospitalized or in ICU  most likely the attending doctor has never met them and must ask, “Did you ever speak to your mom about her wishes?  Do you know what she would want?” More often than not a son or daughter will say, “No, we never talked about it.” This creates a distressing situation for both the family and the medical team. Family members are pressed to make heart wrenching decisions while receiving conflicting messages from various medical providers about what is best.  

Invariably families will lean towards heroic measures to help their loved ones, rather than live with the guilt of not having done everything humanly possible. Even in situations where there is a very slim chance for recovery and while they watch their loved one endure prolonged suffering. This is why statistics show families are nine times more likely to suffer post-traumatic stress disorder and prolonged grief when a loved one dies in ICU.

When my brother Johnny died of cancer, I tortured myself with thoughts of if only… I had not said this, if only I had said that. These thoughts seemed to drown out all the love my brother and I shared, the good care I provided and how I was able to be there for him. Even with all my years of nursing experience and all my learning, when it came to my dear brother I felt I had blown it. I too experienced complicated grief.

There is another way and it starts with a conversation. It begins by asking oneself, “What do I love?  What makes my life worth living?” We need to talk about our wishes long before an illness occurs that results in a crisis. We need to include our family in the conversation and as well as our young people. They too need to weigh in and tell us what they would want if compromised. This is one of the greatest gifts we can give our loved ones to prevent placing them in the agonizing dilemma of having to choose.

There is a grass roots effort underway that can provide the needed support. Visit  theconversationproject.org and receive the gift that offers peace of mind for you and your loved ones.

 

 

 

 

In loving remembrance of  Elizabeth Dorothea Sorensen February 17, 1916- August 20, 2014

Liz Sorensen Wessel

Photos by ~liz

Days 267-271 - The Courage to Live...and to Die?

"Dying is easy it's living that scares me." Cold Album -Anne Lennox

   On July 20, 2015, long time British Nurse Gill Pharaoh shared a dinner with her husband as they cruised down the Rhine. The next day, she entered a Swiss clinic. With her husband present, Nurse Pharaoh (in photo) voluntarily received a dose of a life-ending drug.

   Ms. Pharaoh was seventy-five. She was in excellent mental & physical health. "I only have a few aches and pains but I feel my life is complete. I'm ready to die," she said.

   Her explanation can pierce the hearts of caregivers everywhere. Gill spent her career caring for the frail elderly. She did not wish to become one of them. She felt so strongly about this that she took the ultimate step. 

   It is easy to condemn her decision & the laws that make it possible in some parts of the world. It is more difficult to seek to understand Pharaoh's choice.

   A new film portrays the life & suicide of the widely acclaimed author David Foster Wallace. In a two-page note Wallace left he offers a compelling analogy. Many of those who commit suicide, he writes, feel as if they are in a burning building. They must jump to avoid the agony of remaining.  

  Though Pharaoh also took her life her case is different & strange. Pharaoh saw a "building" she felt was on fire & decided not to enter it. She wanted to avoid the indignities of a compromised existence in the house of the elderly. She wanted to tell us that too many people are living too long in ways that burden others.

  Gill Pharaoh's career was a triumph of loving care. Did her choice to die tarnish her legacy, enhance it, or offer some other commentary worthy of reflection? 

-Reverend Erie Chapman

Days 265-266 Serenity

May God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can; 
and wisdom to know the difference.
-Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971) 

I wonder how many of us have uttered these words in moments of despair; either for ourselves or for those we love. Niebuhr’s prayer holds so much wisdom; simple yet profound. We embrace the strength that prayer offers; especially when life seems anything but serene.

 Often the source of our suffering is our thoughts. The negative messages we have internalized, crucify us. We may condemn ourselves for perceived wrongs that if turned inward can culminate in self-loathing. It is hard to see someone hurting and feel powerless to help them see how beautiful they really are.

Love is our resurrection.

 Love does not judge because all  God can see is the light of our essence. We too can learn too see with Love’s eyes and offer kindness and forgiveness to ourselves along with others. I believe that God is conversing with us all the time, whether through a conversation with a friend, a song we hear, something we read; a call for help, they are all threads connecting us.

 This week, I received an outreach call from a 39 year old woman in great distress who was inquiring about our services. She was in a hospital and was anticipating going home. Although she had been on hospice she wanted to transition to palliative care and resume treatment. The hitch was her oncologist would not order her pain medications and she was reluctant to go to the outpatient clinic where she did not think she would receive compassionate care. She was very tearful. I listened and tried to explore options. She decided to stay with her current care provider. I encouraged her to call me anytime if  I could be of help. She never offered her name.

 She has been on my mind all week. I only wish I had asked her name and phone number so I could try to figure out a way to make things happen for her remove the barrier. I believe God sent her my way to be of help but I did not come up with a solution to her dilemma in the spur of the moment. Unfortunately, I missed the mark and it has heightened my awareness to the importance of recognizing these God given moments.

 Perhaps, there will be someone that God sends your way today. Pay attention. We do not always get a second chance.

 -Liz Sorensen Wessel

Watercolor by ~liz

Days 260-264 - Seeing The Wind

 

 

 "Those things are beautiful which please when they are seen." - St. Thomas Aquinas

   Her eyesight was among the best of anyone who ever lived. Yet, she probably never saw a sunrise nor would she recall seeing a flower or the face of anyone she loved. Still, with her exquisite sensibilities she could see the wind & discern the shape of love. 

  Blind from age two, Helen Keller lacked the rods & cones that detect light, send it through our optic nerves & enable its translation into the imagery our minds interpret. Yet, Keller possessed a more powerful gift: sacred sight. Her heart saw what most cannot.    

   Hindus have a beautiful way of symbolizing this with the dot, or bandi, women wear on their foreheads. This is "the third eye" that sees the sacred.

   Still our actual eyes provide endless gifts if we can perceive beyond how they enable navigating the transactional world. "When we see beauty in sensible things, we are grasping their secret, living form," John O'Donohue wrote. "While the experience of beauty has a wonderful immediacy, it is not something that simply happens."

   How can we deepen our sight? O'Donohue emphasizes a key. "The task of true knowing is slow and difficult; yet when pursued, it often opens us to the delight of being surprised and overtaken by beauty." If you seek peace, look to beauty.

  Our eyes inform us a baby is sleeping. Embrace your third eye & awaken to beauty - as in the image that shows my son's first encounter with his newborn sister. To see this you must slow down. 

  Fear blocks "seeing." For example, those afraid to experience Renoir's nudes miss what Rodin observed, that if we want to see beauty we must look to the nude.

  Want to see the wind? Close your eyes.

-Erie Chapman

Photographs: "Sunrise, Atlantic" & "Homecoming 1971" by Erie