Journal of Sacred Work

Days 28-32 - Big Harp, Little Harp

   While writing a new book on leadership I came across the most powerful metaphor on relationships I have ever encountered. (I also shared this on my Facebook page.) 

   It is from John O'Donohue's spectacular book, Beauty.

   “There is a kindness in beauty which can inform and bless a lesser force adjacent to it. It has been shown, for instance, that when there are two harps tuned to the same frequency in a room, one a large harp and the other smaller, if a chord is struck in the bigger harp it fills and infuses the little harp with the grandeur and beauty of its resonance and brings it into tuneful harmony. Then, the little harp sounds out its own tune in its own voice.” (italics added)

   O’Donohue points out that, “This is one of the unnoticed ways in which a child learns to become herself. Perhaps the most powerful way parents rear children is through the quality of their presence and the atmosphere that pertains in the in-between times of each day. Unconsciously, the child absorbs this and hopefully parents send out enough tuneful spirit for the child to come into harmony with her own voice.”

   Come into a room playing harmonious music and you will influence every other "harp" in the room. The other "harps" can do the same with you. Light a candle and turn on a lamp and two kinds of light grace the room. 

   Boom out disharmony and you will influence the music in another way. Others can also darken your sound.  

   Once again, the power of Love's music is affirmed. Be an instrument of Love and you can sing her beauty into every relationship you have.

-Erie Chapman

Photo by Erie Chapman

 

Days 25-26 Quickening Alive

“The light takes us as we are, broken and uncertain as we are. The light does not judge us as we judge ourselves. It seeks us, and it blesses everything it touches.” Tracy Cochran

 Please note: This reflection is dedicated to Candi Maio, for I love her song of Love.

Music travels on a prism of  light, as  Spirit connects our heartbeat with the pulse of life. Listening to a melody can enliven our experience and transform the ordinary into a transcendent moment. One such twinkling lives in my memory.

 It was a grey shrouded day and the rain was releasing her pent up anguish. I was driving and weaving my way through traffic and flooded streets towards my destination.  I arrived late at my next patient’s house due to the less than ideal weather conditions. As I pulled up to the curb a torrential downpour ensued.

While I sat waiting for the rain to lift, I noticed the tension in my body and my hassled mood. When suddenly one of those peak moments took me by surprise. My senses were overcome with the most exquisite sounds of classical music opus that I was hearing for the very first time. I sat motionless and listened in sheer bliss.

Physician author, Oliver Sachs has studied and written about his experiences helping  patients with  the healing power of music. He has observed an innate affinity we  humans have for music and  studied how our auditory and nervous systems are finely tuned with  music.

In the video below, we get to witness a remarkable transformation in an elderly man who on the surface might seem to be only a shadow of a person. Yet, with music his spirit comes alive and he shares his  profoundly beautiful truth.

Most often we look for medications to ease physical, emotional and spiritual suffering, yet music can connect us with our soul in a miraculous way.

Liz Sorensel Wessel

Watercolor polyprint by ~liz

Note: readers might also enjoy Erie Chapman's recent essay "Days 356-360 Music and the Soul" (Dec 23, 2013 ).

 

 

Days 20-22 - The Art of Affirmation

   If people's bodies were the physical size of their impact on the world, Martin Luther King, Jr. would have dwarfed the clouds. So would have Mother Theresa and Gandhi.

   These three beings - who were, of course, our size - affirmed towering principles. They honored our humanity in world-changing ways.

   How do you affirm others in your own way?

   Affirmation is one of Love's greatest powers. If I tell you I love you I have complimented more than your behavior. I have recognized the beauty in your soul and thanked your spirit. 

   Love warms you like the sun snuggling into the dish towel.

   In some places caregivers are ordered to send thank you notes. These may be helpful. But kind words are about more than the science of penning compliments.

   Affirming language and gestures matter when they arise from sincerity. They not only recognize the receiver but energize you. 

   Love flows through an open heart. A closed heart is a damaged one. 

   Part of the art of affirmation comes in how you express it.   Specific thanks reflect thoughtfulness. 

   If you have worked especially hard to help a person they can say, "Thank you." It will mean more to you if they say, "Thank you for the way you cradled my head when you fed me, for the way you sat with me and how you listened to me when I was afraid."

   An artist friend of mine, Lisa Ernst, shares some of her gorgeous photographs on Facebook (including one, left.) Some post responses like, "Nice pic" or "Awesome." 

   How does more specific affirmation feel? "I love the way the tree curves over the lake, how you caught its reflection, how you captured the dawn awakening the water, how you waited until the light was right."

   Radical Loving Care always calls us to go beyond. Specific compliments take more effort and more deeply affirm the light in another.

   You become a pathway through which your heart meets the spirit of another. You celebrate Love.

-Erie Chapman 

Photos: "Dish Cloth" by erie chapman. Morning mist by Lisa Ernst

Days 18-19 - The Prodigal Son's Journey Upward

Note: Guest essay written by Cheri Cancelliere

Henri Nouwen’s favorite painting was “The Return of the Prodigal Son” by Rembrandt. Nouwen kept a print of the painting in his room that was among his most treasured possessions. He was on a journey to St. Petersburg for a film project based on his book about this poignant masterpiece when God called him home. Nouwen, the restless seeker, wounded warrior and suffering saint completed his journey upward to His Heavenly Father.

Nouwen had reflected and written about the timeless story often, integrating the spiritual journeys of the prodigal son, the older brother and the father. Nouwen considered their journeys of rejection, suffering, love and redemption as his own story and the story of all humanity. Each person is lured by the world to be relevant, spectacular and powerful; to think that the grass is greener, we know better, and there is something more exciting beyond the place in our hearts where we are safe, secure and loved by God.

            Like Nouwen, our pursuit of perfection lives in tension with the reality of our own imperfection. We must learn to embrace and befriend tension. The polarities of our lives help us move toward wholeness just as the consequences of the prodigal son’s rejection of his father’s love enabled him to finally accept his true self, worthy of love and capable of loving in return. On the journey of our lives, God’s perfect love runs to meet us in our imperfection and by grace we receive wholeness through brokenness, power through weakness and communion through suffering. When the prodigal son began his journey home, it was a journey upward. He had sunk so low, the only way for him to go was up. We too must begin our journey upward, for we cannot love ourselves as God’s beloved children or love others as ourselves if we do not first know and love God.

Long before the prodigal son came to himself and began his upward journey, his father was looking for him, waiting for him. God’s unconditional love calls us by name. Love draws us home. When we reach the end of ourselves, we find our way. With love, there is joy even in the midst of suffering and Nouwen understood suffering far too well. We are loved perfectly in spite of our imperfection. When the prodigal son returned to his father’s house, he said yes to love. When we say yes to God’s love, then “we can reach out to him in the midst of a broken world and feel at home while still on the way” (Reaching Out 1975).

Nouwen learned what it meant to be a father when he cared for a seriously disabled young man named Adam. In the eyes of the world, Adam did not have anything of value, but to Nouwen, he was a priceless gift. Nouwen’s greatest achievements meant nothing to Adam, only his unconditional love and acceptance. As a surrogate father, Nouwen discovered that “knowing God’s heart means consistently, radically, and very concretely to announce and reveal that God is love and only love” (In the Name of Jesus 1989). Through his relationship with Adam, Nouwen’s understanding of the circle of love became complete.

Like the story of the prodigal son, the story of Henri Nouwen’s life points the way to communion with God and assures that our Heavenly Father awaits us. He runs to greet us. He is eager to shower us with love and blessing. As we move upward, no matter how imperfectly, we will learn who we are and more importantly, who God really is. We will have come home to our Father’s house, filled with joy and praise in His healing presence that sets us free to truly love and serve others in their suffering, secure in the knowledge of our own belovedness.

By Cheri Cancelliere

Thank you Cheri for sharing the gift of your beloved reflection with us!

Days 13-17 - Creative Blaming

   My three-year old grandson has an older sister (as do I.) Little brothers learn how to deflect blame early. 

   At my son's wedding, that three-year old was the ring-bearer. Inevitably, he managed to loosen the rings from the pillow and they hit the hardwood floor with a double clang. "I didn't do it," he proclaimed to the crowd. "Daddy did it!"

   Over the Christmas holidays the same little guy got into a fight with his sister. Stuck on what words to use he decided to spit instead. "No spitting!" I told him. "I didn't do it," he protested. "It came from the ceiling."

   Punishment for our wrongs causes us to develop the art of blaming early in life. Why suffer when you can shift the heat to someone else?

   You may have refined this skill in your adulthood. It requires courage to volunteer to your boss that you have erred. It is equally tough for a leader to acknowledge mistakes.

   Chronic fault-finding with others poisons any setting. Real solutions go deeper than simple accountability. 

   In order to grow Love you need to shrink your ego. Love can only thrive in the garden of humility.

   If you are spending lots of time blaming others than you are missing the chance to solve the problems in front of you and to strengthen your life skills. 

   Success never comes to those who blame. With his final breaths Michelangelo said, "I am still learning." 

   -Erie Chapman 

Days 11-12 - The Gift of Grace

 

“In mythos and fairy tales, deities and other great spirits test the hearts of humans by showing up in various forms that disguise their divinity. They show up in robes, rags, silver sashes, or with muddy feet. They show up with skin dark as old wood, or in scales made of rose petal, as a frail child, as a lime-yellow old woman, as a man who cannot speak, or as an animal who can. The great powers are testing to see if humans have yet learned to recognize the greatness of soul in all its varying forms.” 
― Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype

The symbolism of the swan is an ancient sacred icon. In many parts of the world, this great white bird represents Light and embodies a marriage of opposites, of fire and water. As such, we are reminded that we are both physical and spiritual beings. Grace is the gift of being at home in both of these realms of our being.

As a water bird, the swan connects us with emotions. Various swan stories have been passed down through the ages. Many serve to awaken our intuition and naturally restore balance.

What about our own stories? Too often we get caught up in the drama of our lives. The stories we believe about ourselves or others can become distorted by fear, anger and judgment. Yet, if we drop the story line, all we are left with is raw emotion. We all carry wounds of varying degrees and situations can easily trigger painful emotions. Learning to be present to the unwanted parts of ourselves compassionately is the key to healing.

We can begin to notice the emotion beneath our story. Is there judgment towards ourselves or another person that is binding our heart? When we stay present with our experience and let go of blame what is left? Perhaps, there is uncertainty, vulnerability or some truth that we would rather avoid. Yet once acknowledged the tight constricting grip upon our heart begins to loosen.

The swan’s eloquence and beauty is connected on many levels with the soul, love, music, and poetry. In Irish folklore, the Children of Lir were turned into swans as the sound of their sweet voices enchanted all who heard them sing. So much so, the listeners were comforted and peacefully lulled to sleep.

In the well-known Hans Christian Anderson fable, "The Ugly Duckling",  was ostracized for being different than the others. Yet, to the surprise of everyone he grew into a gorgeous swan. This story illuminates the truth that first appearances can be misleading and our real beauty blossoms from within. Our luminescence shines ever brighter when we are open and receptive to the transformative power of Love.

Liz Sorensen Wessel

Mandala by ~liz

 

 

Days 6-10 - What Is "Right" With You

   Preparing for a biathlon with my track star daughter in 1988 I visited my doctor for a physical. Months of training had put me in good shape. I awaited my doctor's affirmation

   "How did I do?" I asked.

   "Well," he said blandly, "I couldn't find anything wrong."

   Doctors are trained to diagnose problems and often forget to celebrate their patient's health. I once asked a group of radiologists to review a strategic plan. Taught to find spots on the lung they could only see what was "wrong" with the plan by knit-picking sentences. 

   Maybe this happens to you. There is nothing "wrong" with the baby in the photo. Not long into his life his loving parents will naturally start pointing out issues. Obviously, it is necessary to warn him not to touch hot things. But, as he grows into childhood successful parenting will "catch" him doing what is right rather than wrong.

   As you consider your life start with a diagnosis of what is right with you. If you list all the mistakes you do not want to make this year you have written a prescription for failure. Focus on your strengths and your weakness will naturally fade.

   One member of the dietary staff at Baptist Hospital told me years ago that her path to successful dieting was through "Want" power. "Put your energy on what you want and you won't need so much will power," she advised me. 

   Where attention goes, energy flows. Concentrate now and every day on love's energy. Love will open your finest gifts.

-Erie Chapman

photograph copyright erie chapman 2009

Days 4-5 - Reshaping Our Eyes

TRANSFORMATION

It could be the letter never answered,
the one in which you declared your love
in such a tender way, admitting to every-
thing. Or when the shell you brought all...
the way from the Philippines is dropped
by some loud stranger you never wanted
to show it to in the first place. It could all
unravel the moment the shell shatters on
your floor. Or on a summer bench, your
eyes closed, your fear about to vanish, the
heat bathing you as bees begin to fly.

It could happen anywhere you linger
too long, anywhere you stop hauling and
counting, when your mind spills its tangle
of lists. Often it comes with the relaxation
of great pain. When the hip finally mends
enough to step. Or your need to know
is broken by a bird lifting into light.

Or when succeeding in being something
you’re not. Being influential when you’re
shy. Or rugged when you’re tender.

Or while watching an old tree slip into
winter, like the one thing you won’t let
go of dropping all its leaves.

When the elements in all their beauty
reshape our eyes, it is God’s kiss: gentle
as erosion. When you could crumble in
an instant—all your pain, salt waiting
for a wave—you are close.

–Mark Nepo, Parabola Magazine
Winter 2014 Issue: "Liberation & Letting Go."

Watercolor by Liz Sorensen Wessel