And I said to a man who stood at the gate of the year; “Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.” And he replied: “Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God. That shall be to you better than a light and safer than a known way.” ~M. L. Haskins
Fear creates an illusion of separateness. Worries flare in shards of anxiety.
First instinct is to run from life’s quandary but instead I freeze. I heard your voice and turned
Just in time to glimpse pearls streaming from heaven.
Reflecting the truth of what we are. For beneath our human frailties and half truths
Lives a deeper truth
A radiance from which we are born.
By saying uncomfortable feelings out loud, it somehow magnifies their significance and increases my vulnerability. I’d rather share with you serene surface thoughts but I owe you so much more. Given a little space I notice my emotions play out and perspective returns. (I am grateful when perspective returns balance). Suddenly, what seemed monumental now seems almost silly, if it were not so painful. Perhaps, an emotion “playing out” is an apt term. I am hopeful that the more I notice the pattern; the intensity of my emotions will lessen and lose power over time.
However, I am getting sidetracked from what I really want to say. Our circumstances in life are not significant; we can be on top of the world one moment and tragedy might strike the next. What matters most, is how we respond. Although, I may have heard these words a thousand times over, they hold a new meaning for me. Tara Brach offers wise counsel by encouraging us to be present to what arises in a life affirming way. Not to deny pain, anger, anxiety, sorrow or any uncomfortable emotions but to allow ourselves to feel and acknowledge them and to offer loving kindness and acceptance.
Often we may avoid painful emotions by numbing out with various distractions, be it food, alcohol, T.V. etc. Yet, I can't help wonder, if we avoid feeling our difficult emotions do we miss out on feeling the good ones such as joy and happiness, too?
As I stand at the gate of this year I have ample time to reflect. It is clear to me that each of YOU are pearls streaming from heaven and that we are inexplicably strewn together by Love. I will place my hand into God’s loving trust as I cross the threshold into this New Year. I can relax into the new and leave old worries and cares behind because it is not what happens that is of relevance. I can only take with me the gratitude in my heart for your radiance in my life.
Note: I dedicate this post to my sister Patricia Maio who has offered me a lifetime of love and is a radiant pearl in my life. Happy Birthday, Pat!
~liz Sorensen Wessel
Mandala, Dec. 2012 by ~liz
