(Note: The following meditation was written by Liz Wessel, R.N., M.S., Director of Education/Mission Services for St. Joseph Health System Home Health Netework, Orange, California.)
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When I told my sister Kitty of my plans to attend a silent retreat last weekend, she said, “You mean you are not going to talk for two days? That sounds like pure torture to me.” The retreat was facilitated by James Finley, a former Trappist monk, author, and psychologist who studied closely with Thomas Merton (left.) The following are some reflections from this expansive experience. I had the gift of time; to meditate, take garden strolls, make brush strokes with watercolors, sit in prayerful silence, and listen in deeper awareness. As my mind’s chatter began to quiet, my heart opened...
The realization that we have been Loved into being, moment by moment is a humbling experience. To delve deeper into this understanding of being Loved endlessly, even in our brokenness, Loved regardless of achievement of failure, is cause for reverence and deep gratitude.
I spent time in the lap of a garden, listened to birds share their stories. I explored the many little reflection areas accepting their invitations of peace. I sat in early morning, motionless; I heard an unfamiliar buzz. Before long, I caught sight of a finch darting to and fro. Careful not to startle her I focused on her activity. The noise was her little ones, hungry for a morning meal. Each time she returned to the nest the chirping grew louder, “Feed me, me, please feed me.” I watched for a long time absorbed in the endless devotion of a mother’s Love filling needs.
Within these cloistered walls, I felt protected from the troubles of the world. The sun shone brightly bathing all in tranquility. I began to appreciate the sun’s gift, revealing the shadow side of everything.
As I sat looking at the garden wall, a marvelous performance came to life. Silhouettes of tree branches danced in wind’s warm caress. Shapes of birds flitted branch to branch. I was reminded of childhood books where still pictures became animated with a quick fan of the pages. As I witnessed this dance of life, a natural unfolding, without worry or hesitation, I recognized my little part in it all.
I find myself attracted to the hidden shadows of things where I connect with the underlying intention of this universe. I see the every day and I try to anchor myself in safety and security. Yet, I am drawn to the invisible nature of Love that forms the whole.
I visited the chapel frequently, bathed in the light that shined through stained glass.
Peace
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Sun's rays filter calm on the chapel's adobe wall
converging with hearts that seek union.
Silence shines on Love's rising.
I breathe in God's essence,
release peace
with each out breath.
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I attended morning mass, with Sisters; the priest uttered these words during the celebration of the Eucharist, “Receive as you are, become as you receive.” I wanted to embrace the shadows of myself to become whole. Thankful to have been Loved into the present moment and eager to follow the one true commandment, “To Love one another.”
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Shining Empty are Words
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Sun, giver of light affirmations,
shines empty on a garden wall’s screen.
Wind breathes life
into a shadow’s translucence
revealing glimpses
of nature’s formless charm.
Grey dancing movements
ground in silent song,
harmonize in a
distant restless soul.
Discard thinking!
Take the hidden journey
that seeks one’s true
by honoring disquiet.
This cracks us open
to be thankful for
hearts’ throbbing aches.
Keeping company with awareness,
listening transcends,
pretence falls, the veil melts away.
The heart sees you as precious.
Our strength lies in one
giving & one receiving.
Little kindnesses matter most.
Heaviness eases, energy shifts
releasing fears of death.
Mindfulness creates
our sweetest joy.
Light’s colors deepen in naked faith
as we relax into the
invitation of our yes to dance free
as all falls away except the sacred
gift of grace.
Let me lose myself for you to find
unending Love divine.
