A nurse pauses three seconds before entering one of her patient's rooms, repeats to herself, "This is a person made vulnerable by illness." She then enters the room with grace and an open heart, ready to respond to the needs of a suffering human being.
This nurse's pause at the door reflects a lovely if uncommon ritual, taught in some nursing schools and practiced infrequently. Before entering a patient's room, remember the special nature of caregiving. Recall the essential humanity of the person in need.
What if each of us engaged in similar kind of ritual before every encounter with another (and mid-encounter?) Why is such a reminder necessary?...
Amid the hectic demands of caregiving, it can be hard to remember, much less practice, such a fine ritual. There are challenging obstacles:
- Some patients are disoriented and confused. If you're assigned to care for patients suffering from dementia, it may take a special effort to recall the equal humanity of the person.
- Some patients are unconscious. If you're an operating or recovery room caregiver, it may take special sensitivity to treat the inanimate form in front of you with the respect each human deserves.
- Some patients are rude and inconsiderate. This always challenges the caregivers to be compassionate toward a patient that is shouting in your face.
- Caregiving work has elements of the routine. The repetitiveness of certain caregiving duties may dull or harden the sensitives of some towards others.
Imagine the impact if every caregiver engaged in the three second ritual several times each day? I don't mean only nurses, but every technologist, housekeeper,
dietician, information tech, maintenence worker and,
by golly, every executive as well! This simple three-second pause could transform the delivery of compassionate care in America because it reinforces what has been lost in so many organizations: mindfulness.
Another small practice I instituted as CEO at Baptist Hospital in Nashville was to call upon all caregivers to knock before entering. Even this little courtesy is ignored in most hospitals. The door knock announces, respectfully, your arrival. As if the patient room is the patient's bedroom, not a public lobby. The three-second pause reminds caregivers of the sacred nature of their work.
If you've ever been a patient, you know how much you may feel like a hostage. You lie there disabled and dressed in a terrible garment called a patient gown. Naturally, you would prefer the privacy of your own bedroom or at least the relative sanctity of a hotel room. Instead, a vast array of strangers enter and leave your room as if there were no door at all.
How can we restore "the sacred" to caregiving? The three second pause, ritualized into daily and nightly practice and accompanied by taking a breath, is a good start. It could go a long way toward helping not only patients, but caregivers. Each three seconds blesses the special nature of caregiving. Each three-second hesitation increases the chance that the patient will be treated with love. Each three-second reflection becomes a sort of mini-meditation for each caregiver, allowing more of a chance for Love's grace to shine through.
Reflective Practice:
1) Imagine a sentence or two you could say to yourself in your own Three Second Ritual. It can be something like: This is person before me is a child of God, or a child of Love. If you would prefer something less religious, consider: I am healthy and privileged to be able to care for this person in need.
2) The language doesn't have to be the same every time since we don't want the thought to be too automatic or mechanical. It is the pausing that is ritualized. The thought should be consciously compassionate and should be accompanied by taking a breath.
3) Start this practice today and continue it every day from now on.
