Journal of Sacred Work

The Day I Won The Lottery

 

Naturally, I recall that day's anticipatory joy.

   The memory evokes a seven centuries old sentence: Dante's opening to, The Divine Comedy,*: “Midway along the journey of our life I woke to find myself in a dark wood, for I had wandered off from the straight path."

   The sentence matters because we wonder: "Where am I in my life?" Or, when older, "Where have I been?"

   In the middle of my life I won the lottery. No dark wood but a sunlit dream.  Greeks coined such epiphanies Anagnorisis**

   The day the prize was delivered, July 1, 1983. At thirty-nine, I walked through the doors of not just any hospital, but Riverside Methodist, the largest in Ohio. I was too immature to imagine the depth of the victories ahead including becoming a top ten hospital and reshaping RMH into a flagship as founding president of OhioHealth.

   Thousands of other caregivers walked through those same doors. I was their CEO. What an incredible privilege it was...and remains so to this day.

   Ten years later, my son said: "Dad! You are at the top of your career!" Still not getting it, I told him, "No. I must go higher."

   Such ambition blocked my grasping that good luck in the moment. Yes. There were more successes, mixed with agonizing personal defeats. Yet, my son was right. 

   Some say in the middle of their lottery-winning days, "Thank God it's Friday." Or, "I can't wait until retirement." 

   If you are any level caregiver today and hear yourself wanting "out" you have "wandered off the path" or are under-appreciating your riches. Each day you awake in the middle of your chance to help heal others.

   Realizing your calling is better than winning the lottery because it is a lifetime gift. I finally appreciate that. We tried our best to help thousands. And did.    

-Erie Chapman

Photo: Riverside 2024 and circa 1980s

*Also contains Dante's Inferno describing the nine circles of hell. 

**Anagnorisis a moment in a play...when a character makes a critical discovery...recognition not only of a person but also of what that person [or moment] stood for. 

Who We Truly Are

We do not become healers.
We came as healers. We are.
Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not become storytellers.
We came as carriers of the stories
we and our ancestors actually lived. We are.
Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not become artists. We came as artists. We are.
Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not become writers.. dancers.. musicians.. helpers.. peacemakers. We came as such. We are.
Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not learn to love in this sense.
We came as Love. We are Love.
Some of us are still catching up to who we truly are.

~Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes

These wonderful words of wisdom by Clarissa Pinkola Estes speaks to my heart. I think about my long and distinguished career in nursing of 47 years and the versatility it has afforded me. My first nuring job was on a hospital  oncology unit, then in community nursing to include home health, hospice care, palliative care, program development, education, leadership, and Mission integration. Pre-nursing, I worked evenings as a psychiatric aide in an inpatient facility while in high school.  My first job in CA was as a nurses aide in a skilled nursing facility. Throughout it all there has been countless ways to bring creativity into the art and science of nursing.

Florence Nightengale expressed this so beautifully, "Nursing is an art: and if it is to be made an art, it requires an exclusive devotion as hard a preparation, as any painter's or sculptor's work; for what is the having to do with dead canvas or dead marble, compared with having to do with the living body, the temple of God's spirit?"

As we journey through life, we learn through experiencing, discovering and living into our calling. Regardless of what we do, Dr Estes sums it up so very well in this one line, "We came as Love. We are Love. 

May we remember who we truly are. 

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel
Watercolor/ink pen by ~liz

Radical Hope Starts With Reality

 "Hope starts with reality," Dr. Clay Stauffer intoned, "and Fear is a bad advisor."

   I would have said, "No. Dreams father Hope." Clay is right. The launchpad for dreams is made of concrete. 

   Hope and Fear dominate most lives.    

   Easy to hope if we are healthy and safe. How could cancer's reality bring buoyancy? What about betrayal? What about any loss, especially when hopes for national unity seem distant?

   No depressed person says, "I feel so hopeful." When flattened by life, optimism was as unattainable for me as Pluto.

   Radical Loving Care^® ("Radical," meaning love beyond expectations) encompasses radical hope. Both live outside the box.   

   Caregivers know what once startled me. That many cancer say, "It was the best thing that ever happened to me."

   Miles* (pictured), a profoundly mature 20 year-old also surprised me recently by reporting, "My parent's divorce was one of the best things in my life."

   These radical hopers found joyful surprises beyond the box. How?

   The cancer survivor said, "I learned fearlessness." Miles (pictured) acquired "two great new step-parents and three siblings."

   These two show us the path to Life's fountainhead: Hope. 

-Erie Chapman

*Miles Chapman, my oldest grandson - 9/23

  

Cultivating Gratitude

I was listening to one of Tara Brach’s podcasts on cultivating gratitude this morning. I would like to share just a few pearls in what I heard. "There is an oft-quoted Taoist saying that every human life contains 10,000 joys and 10,000 sorrows."  It's human to suffer, to struggle with painful emotions like sadness, loneliness or anxiety. But it's also inherently human to experience positive feelings like joy, happiness and love. 

 

Brach shared this story told by a Great American historian journalist author James Agee. He recounts an experience during the Great Depression. He found the impoverished elderly woman in the hollows of Appalachia, and she was living in this tiny shack with dirt floors and no heat and no plumbing. So, he asked her, “What would you do if someone came along and gave you some money to help you out?” She was rocking in her chair and shook her head, and she said, “Well I guess I'd give it to the poor.”   

 

Brach offers this epiphany, “What’s so striking about this story is that within it is one of the greatest of the spiritual teachings- the teachings of awakening- which is for true happiness.  It's not about what's happening but how we are relating to it. So, we can be in any state but whether or not we're happy, whether or not we're feeling our hearts are open, it's going to depend on how we're relating to what's happening.”

 

It seems like the people who have the least are often the most generous, sharing what little they have and helping each other.

 

As we enter into this Holy season that is often filled with lots of activity. It is wise to be intentional about taking care not to get so caught up in the busyness that we miss the beauty, mystery and goodness that's available every day. Mindfulness practices can help keep us grounded and aware.

 

I enjoy taking my dog for walks in the neighborhood a couple times each day, He has become so accustomed to our walks that he comes and expectantly waits for me to stop working and get going. It is good for both of us and I find myself increasingly grateful for the nudges that he gives me, our companionship and experiencing and enjoying fresh air, sunshine and beautiful cloud formations depending on the day. An additional benefit is that I am feeling more at home in the nieghborhood, saying hi to people I've never met and engaging in waves, greetings and smiles. It has been lifting my spirit. The two St bernard dogs Abbie and Pugsly are huge furry teddy bears who love for us to stop and pet them. Chance would rather keep on going but he patiently standsby or gives a little yank on the leash to give me a cue.

 

With gratitude,

Liz

Artwork by ~liz

Does A Hospital Leader Matter?

     A month before I departed as CEO of Riverside Methodist Hospital (RMH) and OhioHealth, questions arose about new leadership. As a lame duck CEO, I was powerless to delay layoffs initiated despite the system's booming bottom line and sky-high morale.

    I asked a doctor his thoughts.

   "Not sure the leader matters that much, Erie," he said.

   Months later a colleague called, "Did you hear about Marcy?"

   "No, how is she?" I answered.

   A thirty-year veteran, Marcy Alton* (pictured) whose HR role was organizing events, was one of RMH's most well-loved employees. Her perpetual smile raised everyone's energy. 

   "She was fired," my friend reported.

   "What?" I said.

   "It gets worse. Several employees saw security escorting her to her car. Staff-cut," he said with disgust. "Every eliminated employee is escorted to their car."

   "If they treat Marcy like that, what about me?" staff wondered. Instead of saving money, the bottom line went down as did patient/employee satisfaction.   

   Culture determines behavior. Leaders determine culture. Only the board can remove them. Staff, including doctors, have no vote. 

   Sadly, this story returned eight years later. As I prepared to turn over the reins of Nashville's Baptist Hospital System** to a new President, a neonatologist saw my dismay.

   "Don't worry," she said. The leader doesn't make much difference."

   "What about workplace culture?" I asked

    She shrugged. And was wrong.

   Once again, my successor needlessly cut staff. Once again, satisfaction scores and finances tailed down. 

   Like it or not, every leader, like every parent, store owner, coach and President, impacts energy. Radical Loving Care^® matters. 

   We ignore that truth at our peril. 

-Erie Chapman

*Marcella "Marcy" Alton (1948-2020.) I told her story in 2021 and retell it today.

**Renamed St. Thomas Midtown

NOTE: Please support our mission of loving care via http://www.eriechapmanfoundation.net  or by check to Erie Chapman Foundation, 112 Dunham Springs Lane, Nashville. 

   

One Small Step

One Small Step is a StoryCorp Program that invites two people who are stangers with differing political views to come togehter for a conversation about their lives not their politics. The beauty of these encounters is that sthe conversations are about getting to know the person rather than by labeling someone. To really see the person beyond surface impressions. At the end of a 50 min conversation would be strangers are now friends. This is a wonderful example of planting seeds that will someday blossom. Seeds of healing for a nation that is in desperate need of reconcilation, forgiveness and finding a path towards unity.

I just love these two short (2 min) videos that reminds us of who we are and celebrates our humanity.  May we find our way home to each other.

 

Tell us what you think.

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel

Changing the Face of the Mountain

Once upon a time, in a remote, unfriendly village that clung to the side of a mountain, there lived an old woman whose habits seemed strange to her neighbors.  Since the harsh winters kept most villagers huddled near their fireplaces, they did not cultivate the art of hospitality, and rarely spoke to anyone outside their immediate families.

The mountainside, itself bleak and barren, beckoned no one toward its slopes, even in the less harsh seasons of the year.  Only the children ventured to climb, ever so stealthily, partway up its side; a daring feat that they were cautioned not to do by their parents.

During such furtive forays, they inevitably met the old woman.  Most of the time she was bending over, digging a little hole in the ground, and dropping a tiny something into it.  The braver children asked: “what are you doing, old woman?”  Her reply was always the same: “I am changing the face of the mountain.” 

The children grew into adulthood, and most left the village for the world of cities.  It came to pass, however, after several decades, one grown child returned to show her husband and children the harsh environment of her youth that she had often described to them.  She came back but she did not recognize it. 

The mountainside was ablaze with a dazzling array of colorful flowers gently swaying in the breeze.  Clusters of bushes and young trees lent their foliage as shade to the myriads of children and adults gathered along the base of the mountain.  All spoke to each other, laughed and played games.  Families and neighbors picnicked together.

The woman who had returned stopped one of the villagers to ask: “When did all of this come about?  What happened to the bleak and barren mountainside of my childhood?”  The villager replied: “Do you remember the strange old woman who lived here, the one who would wander up and down the mountainside?”  It was she who planted these seeds.  She went out every day, intent on her sowing; believing all the while the results would fruit.”

The woman did recall the image of this old and bent figure from her childhood.  At last, she understood the meaning of these words: “I am changing the face of the mountain.

 

This story was shared with me some years ago. However, this week it surfaced in my thoughts as a message that I needed to hear and reflect upon. May we plant seeds for the good of all. 

Artwork by my dear friend Diane Barrows

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel

 

Change or Revelation?

   Near the end of a long and unusual career, it is affirming when caregivers say, "Erie, you changed my life. You discovered a strength I didn't recognize."

   Today, I realized those two sentences signal very different processes. The first implies "changing" another. The second honors what was already there. 

   The second approach rings truest today.   

   Kirsten, my profoundly encouraging wife of 58 years, elicits my best. Her ability to expose my weaknesses highlights better paths. 

   The best aspects of parenting our children Tyler and Tia, honored their potential. Luckily, that offset some mistakes. 

   We are grateful rather than proud of them and the parents they became.  We did not change them. We encouraged. 

   Good leaders, like OhioHealth's first HR Senior VP Mark Evans, mirror good parenting. He focused his team's energy on strengths rather fault-finding. 

   For years, I have campaigned for leadership that catalyzes positive powers. This Journal contrasted this Presidential campaign's leadership styles as a learning for all leaders.

   In fact, this election taught a huge lesson I did not foresee. 

   President-elect Trump, the same leader who incited a mob to stop the Senate from certifying his loss, recognized that America's frustration was not a trickle but a raging river. He opened the floodgates for Americans, who were "mad as hell and wouldn't take it any more!"*

   Anger's energy can be converted for good. What Trump does with the immense resource of American's frustration is far more important than winning the election.

   Will he lead like President Theodore Roosevelt who saw the potential of America's natural resources and founded our national parks. Or, had he been President then, would Trump have envisioned the Grand Canyon as a real estate development?

   Will he change our lives by revealing our best, like Lincoln, or incite our worst like Jefferson Davis**? 

-Erie Chapman

Photo: National Park Service/M. Quinn

*Paraphrase from "Network" (1976) 

**President of the Confederacy

 

      

Blessed Are You

Blessed are you who see it all now.
The terrible, beautiful truth that our world,
our lives seem irreparably broken.

And you can’t unsee it.
The hungry kid. The exhausted mom.
The woman who wonders if any of this is worth it.
The loneliness and despair.

Blessed are you who glimpse reality and don’t turn away.
This kind of seeing comes at a steep cost,
and it is a cost you may not have paid intentionally,
but here you are.
Seeing things clearly.

Blessed are you who have worked hard
to keep your heart soft.
You who live with courage,
fixing what is in your reach,
praying about what is not,
and loving, still.

May you experience deeper capacity and glimpses of hope, as
you continue to see the world as it is.

Terrible. Beautiful. Fragile

~ Kate Bowler

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel

Charity Toward All, Revenge, or Bless Them, Change me?

I. "Bless them, change me"

   My friend, perfectly named Ed Goodrich, changed my life today. He knows my distress amid our national leadership crises and how it may impact caregivers.  

   "There's a four word phrase that could help," he said. "When insulted, pray: 'Bless them, change me.'" 

   Instantly, I felt better. No more saying "I'll pray for you." That sounds like I'm asking my God to change your "wrong" into my "right." Bless you. Change me. 

   Beware of political brain fog. Because we support Trump or Harris does mean we ARE either. 

II."With charity toward all"

Cursing fellow Americans while refusing to practice love can be deadly.

  "We are not enemies, but friends," our most admired President told 25,000. "We must not be enemies," he begged; passion may strain friendships, but, "it must not break our bonds of affection."

   Listen to "the better angels of [y]our nature," Abraham Lincoln implored.

   The crowd agreed and fatally failed to heed.

   It was March 4, 1861. Just thirty-nine days later, April 12, 1861, Confederate soldiers fired on Fort Sumter. Deafness to the new President's appeal triggered the most tragic display of homicidal idiocy in American history.

   March 4, 1865, precisely four years later, a victorious and heartbroken Lincoln, appealed once more to the best angels among his 40,000 listeners. Millions had died or suffered other unspeakable loss. Northerners wanted what men's darkest demons always seek: Revenge. 

   Lincoln, would have none of it. "With malice toward none, with charity for all" he told the startled crowd "...let us bind up the nation's wounds, care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan...do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace..."

  April 14, 1865 the calendar again tolled tragedy. Four years and two days after Rebels fired canon balls into Fort Sumter, a revenge-poisoned Rebel fired a single bullet into the head of our finest President.  Lincoln had joined the list of the Civil War dead.

III. "Ultimate and absolute revenge"?

  The same revenge-devil that poisoned Lincoln's assassin now darkens the voice of former President Trump. Increasingly over recent days he has repeatedly promised "ultimate and absolute revenge" against anyone, including Republicans, who opposed him. The list grows by the hour and now includes not just Harris and Pelosi but numerous former members of his own cabinet. A few days ago, he said former Republican Congressman Liz Cheney, should be "shot in the face" by a 9-person firing squad.  

   Will we choose a champion of "Charity toward all" or break "the bonds of affection" by choosing an advocate of violence by Americans against Americans?

   Yes. Trump remains a child of God. May God's blessing quiet hate from both sides, and change us. 

   Meanwhile, why wait for leaders to unite us? Regardless of party, why not heed the voices of our better angels?

-Reverend Erie Chapman, M.T.S., J.D. 

 

   

 

Can Hope Conquer Fear?

   Every patient wants from every caregiver confidence and hope. Every caregiver seeks the same from every leader.

   During my many years leading Riverside Methodist, founding OhioHealth, leading Baptist Hospital System and several other healthcare organizations this has always been my goal. Strategies unfold from caring about caregivers and the work they do and building cultures that sustain that.

   Leadership is sacred work. Trump's approach is threatening to undermine this kind of leadership. 

   How does a leader impact your energy?

   March 4, 1933. 91 years ago. Imagine it today. Americans were terrified. The stock market crash and Great Depression meant America was drowning in an insidious disease: Fear. 

   On that day, President Franklin Roosevelt (FDR) delivered a massive dose of what every American required to cure Fear. Hope. 

   One line rings Hope's bell today: "The only thing we have to fear," FDR intoned, "is fear itself." 

   FDR's energy exudes from the 45 second video. As he spoke I imagine "Fear itself" shrinking. (click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjhPozIeyoY )

   Across the sea Germans, drowning in the same Depression, heard the opposite. Hitler's message: Germany is falling apart. Only I can save you!

   Sound familiar? In 2016 Trump, painted an America in ruins (he still does) and declared, "I alone can fix it."

   In 1933, Fear found a foe in America and an ally in Germany. In 2024, Fear found a criminal ally in America - Donald Trump. Hope found Kamala Harris. 

  "America is strong. I believe in us," Kamala Harris says, like Reagan, Obama, Clinton & most Presidents before. 

   Harris is Hope and Love. Trump is Fear and Hate. 

   Experts say fear is more powerful. Prove them wrong. 

   Cowards prefer bullies.The courageous always choose hope.

   Good leaders always bring out the best in us. Bad ones elicit the worst. 

   If Trump wins, I will, like Kamala, still lean into love...And dread the firehose of hate, lies and fear-mongering he will pour on our country.   

   Should Kamala win, Hope will make "A Comeback.

   That is what happens when Presidents lead with love. 

-Erie Chapman

Poster: Artist unknown

    

In The Garden of Our Hearts

 

Then let the sun come out and
fill the sky with rainbows.

Let the warmth of the sun heal us
wherever we are broken.

Let it burn away the fog so that
we can see each other clearly.

So that we can see beyond labels,
beyond accents, gender or skin color.

Let the warmth and brightness
of the sun melt our selfishness.

So that we can share the joys and
feel the sorrows of our neighbors.

And let the light of the sun
be so strong that we will see all
people as our neighbors.

Let the earth, nourished by rain,
bring forth flowers
to surround us with beauty.

And let the mountains teach our hearts
to reach upward to heaven.

Amen.

~Rabbi Harold Kushner

Shared by Liz sorensen Wessel
Drawing by ~liz

News Flash! You Can Leave Your Presidential Ballot Option Blank!

   The two wildly contrasting pictures share an odd relationship. The first is from the riveting opening scene of World War II film "The Resistance Fighter." It shows a mother, arms around her 6-year-old, shivering in both snow and the fascist presence of a Nazi officer. 

   "There is only one right way!" the officer shouts at her. "Pick!"

   "I don't understand," the young mother stammers.

   "We will decide by a coin flip," the officer says, as the mother realizes she must choose Hitler* or be shot.

   The second image is just a snapshot of me playing peek-a-boo with my mom. But it is from the same time period, 1944!

   I sat safe because Americans had chosen democracy and were fighting to save it. Millions of other children sat terrified because Germany had chosen a fascist, Hitler.  

  On October 22, Trump's longest serving Chief of Staff, Marine General John Kelly told The New York Times, "Trump fits the definition of a fascist."** 

  Meanwhile, I discovered a flaw in counting "undecideds." I kept hearing Republicans complain about Trump but thought they had to vote for him.

  Finally, I asked one: "Why not leave the top spot blank?" 

  "If I could, I would!" he answered.

   "You can," I said. "So, you will!"

   Over the past two weeks, I found ten more college-educated men who mistakenly thought you had to check a box for each race. One was also fuzzy about what fascism meant.**

   After I explained it he laughed, "Now, I can say I didn't vote for the fascist!"

   He joins seven more of that ten who will leave the top spot blank. Could there be more?

   Americans currently face no punishment for their voting choice. Millions living under dictators today do not have that luxury. 

   Trump's handling of COVID and his false FEMA conspiracy theories threatened caregiver-safety. This tells me Harris is best. Others now know another choice: neither. 

 -Erie Chapman

*"VP Nominee, Sen. J.D. Vance has previously called Trump, "America's Hitler." 

**"Under fascism, a government ruled by a dictator controls the lives of the people in that society, and allows no dissent or disagreement." - Merriam-Webster Dictionary.

NOTE: Former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff under Trump, General Mark Milley, agrees with Kelly. 

 

 

The Perfect Crimes? So What!

 "If the Democratic Party wants to stand with anarchists, agitators, rioters, looters, and flag-burners, that is up to them, but I, as your president, will not be a part of it. We must always have law and order." -Trump speech at the 2020 Republic National Convention.

   Law and order? Trump hopes we give up and ignore his crimes.

   After becoming a hospital CEO, I was surprised by how many hospital leaders commit "perfect crimes."  Some CEO's, Vice Presidents and prominent doctors get away with taking kickbacks or escaping sexual assault charges or embezzling money, and more.

   As a federal prosecutor in the 1970's I saw criminals every day. But hospital leaders? How could they get away with crimes?

   Not hard if the facts are ignored. 

   I remember my debut trial. "Not guilty" the foreman pronounced to a shocked judge, me, and even the defendant's own attorney. 

   A bigger shock came when the jurors said later. "Sure, he did it. So what?," one mentioned. "It was just a bomb threat," scoffed another. "He's a kid (19)." 

   The "kid" committed a perfect crime because jurors ignored the facts. Lawyers call it: "Jury nullification."

   Recently, I asked you to be a leader deciding if you would hire someone with a serial criminal background. Now, you are a juror. 

   Americas will soon deliver a verdict in the world's most important case:  Which candidate will lead the free world?

   If you choose the former President you must ignore his conviction on 34 felony counts, his liability for rape, his guilt for bank fraud, and the four other major criminal cases pending against him. 

   One is Election Fixing. After the votes showed a Biden victory, Trump called Georgia's Republican Secretary of State (pictured) and ordered him to, "Find me 11,880 votes!"  

   January 6, 2021 is now among the darkest days in American Constitutional history. The former President faces obstruction of justice and other crimes for agitating the rioters looters, and flag-defacers. Over 1200 other participants have been charged and 750 convicted. 

   If elected, Trump's pardons will free him of everything possible and release hundreds of January 6 convicts. Law and order?

   Detectives seek a criminal's "MO" (modus operandi.) We know Trump's con game. 

   He wants to commit the perfect crimes on the biggest stage possible and then sneer, "Gotcha!"

   Will you think "So What" and let him get away with it? 

-Erie Chapman

Who will hear a call?

 Yesterday,  the following quote was shared by a team member within a small intimate gathering of colleagues as we shared deep gratitudefor the blessings received by being part of our little "dream team" as we have been fondly dubbed by others. " I love the fact the God is a God who encourages relationships not just with Himself but with eachother. I'm thoroughly convinced that God loves us, encourages us, and nurtures us, and supports us through other human beings."~Marilyn Meberg

This quote resonates because I  truly feel that God does speak to me though people in unexpected ways, leaving me keenly aware of the sacredness of the encounter.  It is in these moments that I receive some wisdom that I needed to hear as helpful guidance. These chance conversations overflow in a mutuality of gratitude connecting in a way that we both can feel seen, accepted and loved just as we are.

I  believe that we are the eyes, hands, voice, and feet of Christ (Love) in our world. Am I listening within for the still small voice who offers guidance? Clarissa Pinkola Estes shares, "Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach. Any small, calm thing that one soul can do to help another soul, to assist some portion of this poor suffering world, will help immensely."

 Mother Teresa encourages, "There's a light in this world, a healing spirit more powerful than any darkness we may encounter. We sometimes lose sight of this force when there is suffering, too much pain. Then suddenly the spirit will emerge through the lives of ordinary people who hear a call, and answer in extraordinary ways."

How are you and I being called?

"Whatever the question, Love is the answer." (Anon) Let's choose Love over fear.

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel
Watercoler by Liz

 

 

 

Hope and Joy or...?

   Some people spark such hope in our hearts that even a glance at a picture of them brings instant joy. That is what happens when I see this image of my wife and daughter on my son's porch. 

   As an executive coach I challenge leaders with this question: What is the impact of your presence on others? When you "round" in your hospitals, does energy go up, down or sideways?

   Leaders set the tone. Hope or fear? Confidence or chaos?

   Radical Loving Leadership means taking care of the people who take care of people by being "tough-minded and tender-hearted."*

    Some leaders disagree. "I want my staff to fear me," the CNO at Baptist Hospital told me when I arrived as CEO. "Otherwise, they won't obey me."

   "We can't build a caring culture by scaring caregivers," I told her. She quit.   

   This story is why I feel so strongly about America's leadership. We cannot be a great and loving nation with a bullying Presidential candidate who arrogantly threatens that only he can save what he calls "our failing nation." 

   Policy aside, choosing hope and love matter. Our top-ranked Presidents: Roosevelt, Reagan, Clinton, Obama raised America's energy. Trump, now ranked our worst President, lowered it. Every Presidential expert now ranks Trump as our worst President.

   Lincoln preached "malice toward none."  The former President preaches malice toward all.

   Vice President Harris champions peace and progress. Trump promises chaos and doom. 

   He calls his opponent a "mentally ill, radical Communist," while preaching the odd idea that democracy needs him as "a dictator on day one." His disastrous resume of bankruptcies, felonies and fraud convictions features dangerous election denialism.  He tells women, "I am your protector" thinking they will overlook his own predator's record of serial sexual assaults. 

  How can we tell when Trump is lying? Every time his lips are moving. 

  Do we really want more chaos from a new President bent on revenge? Another "January 6"? Or someone who will lead us forward? 

  I admire and respect people that lift us up. Like that pair of women above do.

-Erie Chapman

*Martin Luther King

   

 

Who Do We Say We Are?

Who do we say we are?… Who is my neighbor? For Christians, Mathew 25:35 offers this wisdom.

^{5 "}for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, ³⁶ I was naked and you gave me clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me.’ ³⁷ Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food, or thirsty and gave you something to drink? ³⁸ And when was it that we saw you a stranger and welcomed you, or naked and gave you clothing? ³⁹ And when was it that we saw you sick or in prison and visited you?’ ⁴⁰ And the king will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.’

Let the rain come and wash away
the ancient grudges, the bitter hatreds
held and nurtured over generations.
Let the rain wash away the memory
of the hurt, the neglect.
Then let the sun come out and
fill the sky with rainbows.
Let the warmth of the sun heal us
wherever we are broken.
Let it burn away the fog so that
we can see each other clearly.
So that we can see beyond labels,
beyond accents, gender or skin color.
Let the warmth and brightness
of the sun melt our selfishness.
So that we can share the joys and
feel the sorrows of our neighbors.
And let the light of the sun
be so strong that we will see all
people as our neighbors.
Let the earth, nourished by rain,
bring forth flowers
to surround us with beauty.
And let the mountains teach our hearts
to reach upward to heaven.

Amen.

May we recognize Christ child, the Divine Spark of Divine, the Holy One (or whatever name you might have for God/Love) in every person we encounter, especially those who are marginalized and outcast by society. Can we live into who we are called to become?

“Whatever the question, love is the answer.” Anon

Shared by Liz Sorensen Wessel
Photo by Chrissy Maio

Both Sides Now

You know Joni Mitchell's song: "I looked at clouds from both sides now..." She sings delicious childhood images. 

"Rows and floes of angel hair/ And ice cream castles in the air/ And feather canyons everywhere/ I've looked at clouds that way."

If you were a dreamy child you remember when you could see clouds as "ice cream castles." You carried those dreams into kindergarten and immediately noticed you had to figure out how to act and checked other kids for cues. Mostly, they looked at the biggest adult in the room.

What is right or wrong? Check the teacher. 

Culture determines much of our behavior. Every hospital caregiver knows that leaders determine culture. 

While running three hospital systems a key decision was picking a team to advance Radical Loving Care. The first leaders I let go were bullies. We want loving caregivers. Not scared ones. 

Interviews and background checks are crucial. Hiring fast and wrong causes pain.

Try this hypothetical: Someone you interview for leadership previously held a huge title and was fired.  His resume says, "Convicted of fraud, liable for rape, a chronic liar, never admits mistakes, routinely insults people, disloyal, chronic womanizer, degrades women and immigrants..." 

You like some of his views so you check references. A flood of letters from top people who worked directly with him say they liked his policies but now believe he is "incompetent," "unstable," "dangerous," and "should not be hired for anything."

Would you hire him? 

No! But some change their mind when I say, "That's Donald Trump's resume."

If you think I'm getting political, would you want Trump running your hospital? This is about supporting loving leadership for caregivers!

"What signal does it send to every healthcare leader in our country if we endorse a bully for our highest office?"

Is one of us chasing an illusion the way Joni Mitchell started to see clouds? "...now old friends are acting strange/ They shake their heads, they say I've changed/ Well something's lost, but something's gained/ In living every day."

What wisdom have we "gained" with cloud games or life experience? Is Joni talking to me when she ends: "It's life's illusions I recall/ I really don't know life at all."

I still believe leadership character matters. Especially in this election. Do you? If not, maybe "I really don't know life at all."

-Erie Chapman

-Album cover: Both Sides Now 

 

My New Best Friend

I fondly recall taking my grandchildren to the park when they were young. I especially remember Starling at age four having fun at the playground. On the way home she would excitedly tell me " Grandma I made new best friend today! Her exuberance and joy in playing with other children and the instant connection and bonds of friendship that formed warmed my heart. On subsequent visits  she might get another chance to play with the same children or discover new playmates and each one was a new best friend to her!

Fast forward to age 11, when Starling visited her CA family she now loves going to the dog park  and watching our dog Chance play with other dogs. Some of the regulars folks who go there have developed friendships and cluster together in their lawn chairs, chatting with eachother and throwing balls for their dogs to retrieve, returning again and again. Chase likes rousing and twirling his body in play with other dogs of all shapes and sizes. Starling takes off to explore and  jumps right in, going up to people she has never met, sitting down to introduce herself and to ask if it is okay to pet their pup. She often begins with, “Can I tell you something?”and enthusiastically shares in her love of dogs, while she pets them and inqires further and offers her observations.

After their family visit and return to S. Dakota a lot of people at the park inquired about Starling and spoke about how much they enjoyed her company and miss seeing her. I love Starling's high spirited energy and how our pets create a wonderful opportunity to talk with people we may not know and discover newfound connections that create friendhip and a sense of belonging.

In Erie's wonderful reflection this week, he highlights the varying levels of tiredness and exhaustion that can accompany caregiving and how the purpose of the JSW is to offer support, honor and express apprecition for caregivers.

There are also so many sacred moments of connection in caregiving that can spark joy and with this in mind I offer you this video produced by Soulpancakes. I hope you EnJOY it as much as I did and that it brightens your day!

 

Liz Sorensen Wessel
Photo of Starling at age four.

"The Complete Book of Caregiving"

Like any good poem, joke or aphorism, the best cartoons say so much with so little. Thank you New Yorker cartoonist, "Warp,"*  Thank you, older-but-looks-younger sister, Ann, for spotting this and sending it with the note: "Right down your alley, Chip" (my nickname.)

If there is more to say, it would be that empathy for caregivers is why this Journal is dedicated to you. At its best, we feature stories that honor your sacrifices and help the general public understand why you might become deeply tired.

Every job can generate fatigue. The best caregivers experience many layers of exhaustion. Beyond the physical comes the cascading emotional toll on those that deliver Radical Loving Care^®. 

One story highlights a solo caregiver's challenge: loneliness. My brother-in-law, Chris Lokvam, now suffers with a Parkinson's-like condition that renders him paralyzed and imprisoned in a chair 24-hours a day. His wife is the single caregiver 95% of the time.

Imagine Jackie's life through the lens of this heart-searing specific: She is called on every 20 minutes of every hour, day and night, to rise and reposition Chris or help him "shuffle" a few feet. 

Sure, she could write a book were she not profoundly exhausted down to the bone.

Thank you Jackie. Thank you Mr. Warp, for helping caregivers smile by wrapping a powerful truth inside a brilliant cartoon.

-Erie Chapman

*Educational Use copyright exception

**Yes. We are part of a family and friends effort to secure help for Jackie and Chris.